@matigo I thought it had been less than that, haha… Oh, I lurk around a bit, but it's generally your articles that encourage me to bite.
// @welcomebot
@matigo Interesting and heartfelt article. While your friend seems to think that "hooking you up" with a girlfriend will solve your problems, building self-esteem and a sense of contribution is not as easy as that.
You have been through an awful lot in recent years, and being without a steady income or the ability to capitalize on freelance income must be a discouraging fact to face. I might agree that having a supportive human partner who appreciates you for the unique and positive qualities you possess might make it easier to power on through each and every day, but as @hazardwarning mentioned, relationships bring with them various other problems. Only you would know whether someone is suitable to be a loving and reliable partner for you. The good thing is that you've had time to reflect on your previous relationship and all that it entailed, and now you must have a better idea of what your needs and requirements are, should someone interesting come along. Perhaps finding a partner that you can share in the joys and tribulations of life with could be something that you could keep on the table as an option, but of course let it be on your own terms.
The Japanese language barrier seems to be giving you difficulties in your job hunt from what I read in your article, although the disjoint between what you want to see in an employer (corporate ethics) and what they have to offer is also clear. Getting only one reply out of one hundred inquiries seems like a very disheartening and humiliating process. Is there any way you can even up the odds a bit and more readily find employers that match your requirements? On the outset, it seems that a recruitment agency might help in this, as they are supposed to be experts in matching job seekers up with the appropriate employers. I know from experience, though, that recruiters in Japan can be less than enthusiastic when it comes to finding specialized positions for people with special talents and needs.
Actually, I still have contact with my previous employer, and I know they have hired foreign nationals for software development and related tasks in the past. If you'd like me to make an introduction and see what options they might have and whether they would be a good fit for you, feel free to ping me and let me know.
I really like the vertical scrolling/reading-a-book kind of design that @matigo uses for his blog. The controls for changing the font type, size and color scheme are also welcome. Nice design that encourages one to read the articles 😌
@matigo Thank you for sharing this story about your father. We can definitely see how his penchant for writing has rubbed off on you along with your respect for people, and it is certain that the apple did not fall far from the tree in that respect. It must not be easy to deal with, but here's hoping that you can find peace in knowing that his suffering is over and that he is still with you in some way, in how he has influenced you over the many years of your life.
@peemee Sounds like you had a hit-and-miss experience. What was the issue with the 20% of the attendees? A lot of inexperienced questions, or perhaps newbie suppositions made with positive certainty?
@peemee Interesting discovery. A rather expensive external display, but if you happened to have it lying around unused, it seems like a good option. I've never owned an iMac—my first Mac was an Intel Mac mini, with which I used a third-party external display. The Intel iMacs aren't too expensive now used, though, at least not here in Japan. Most everyone wants the flashy new colors and the Apple silicon models, even though the displays (Retina) on the newer Intel models seem just as nice.
@matigo Lovely story. The views must have been expansive, although I sympathize about having to bear the cold during this season. At least the canine could get out for some enjoyable walking and interaction with other humans and fellow canine friends.
Interestingly, Omaezaki was one of the places I had intended to visit on a mammoth biking tour of Shizuoka around 2014–2015 or so. Unfortunately, I had some kind of alcoholic beverage on the first day of my tour when I trekked down as far as Toyokawa and stayed there, and undoubtedly the alcohol rushed through my hyper-circulated body like a hammer and put me utterly nauseous, dizzy and out of commission, and what's more the weather turned pouring rain the next morning. I turned tail, rented a car and cut the rest of my tour short, so no Omaezaki for me 😫
@matigo Indeed. Perhaps people are so busy being busy, they are afraid of what would happen if they just slowed down to take a look at the world around them.
Before she passed away, my mother told me a story she had either heard on the news or heard from a friend. It was about how the driver of a bus was in medical distress, but only one person on the entire vehicle actually noticed and was able to offer assistance. Everyone else was engaged with their smart devices or otherwise indisposed. My mother could barely contain her tears when she spoke of that, and she was not one prone to showing emotion at stories like this.
It pays to be mindful, and it can be a service to others if we are mindful of them as well.
@matigo I like what you said about "Writing isn't just about skill or productivity; it's about alignment. When we're out of alignment—with our purpose, our curiosity, or even our inner voice—the words don't flow."
Also, the solution you proposed was useful: "Writer's block, frustrating as it is, might just be the mind's way of saying: Pause. Breathe. Pay attention."
Mindfulness when writing, is perhaps what you are recommending, I gathered. Sounds like a good plan.
It's said that just writing stream-of-consciousness style can help clear out the cobwebs in your brain. That doesn't seem to help me much lately, but it has been useful at times. I often go out for walks with a voice recorder and just talk aloud (not caring overly much about what passersby are thinking, although I do prefer doing this when other people are not around), and I find that can often help unclog any "stuck" thinking processes, even though it may not provide the best answers.